running with a tadpole

After the initial revelation that I was incubating a teeny-tiny little tadpole whose cells continue to rapidly divide, I was somewhat... paranoid. For some reason I had images of me dislodging the poor thing during a run, or worse, that there wasn't really anything there to do damage to. That it was all a dream and I'd wake up at the mercy of yet another menstrual cycle.

I asked a couple other people if they had those same initial fears, and luckily found out that I wasn't alone. Friends repeatedly assured me- the little bugger is far more resilient than you think. But it was hard for me to overcome my hesitations to bounce right back into my normal workout routine without feeling, well, guilty.

Some people would say it's selfish to be concerned with such superficial things as controlling weight gain and maintaining muscle tone while pregnant. That you really ought to take it easy, put your feet up, and give in to those ridiculous cravings. But I'm not one to typically cater to my more lethargic desires, save for the occasional post-20-miler 3 hour nap. The idea of being sedentary not only seems insane for someone like me, but completely counter intuitive to supporting the health of my baby. But how much is enough, and how much is too much?

Well I'm discovering that I haven't given my body nearly enough credit as I should have to let me know first-hand whether it's ready to do more, or needs to take a break. So far, elliptical might make me queasy initially but is great for when the boobs are too sore for running, and I can still whoop my husband's butt running up a hill. But when I'm tired, I'm tired, and I should take it as a sign to rest. Today I got in a solid 20 minutes on the elliptical plus a full-body circuit workout and I felt really great, joking that the kid's gonna come out doing push-ups.

My motives for staying fit are clear, if not slightly selfish. So I'm scared all my mitochondria will shrivel and die if I don't keep up a certain level of cardiovascular fitness... is that really so bad? The important thing is that I scale back the intensity, and stop when my body tells me to. Hopefully that will help me overcome the paranoia.